I am blogging on Living in La La Land & I hope you'll follow along over there!

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

We Are All Scary Mommies!!!!!!!!!!!! {IF YOU THINK YOUR NOT, YES YOU, YOUR IN DENIAL!!!!}

We are all scary mommies:
Jill at http://www.scarymommy.com/  is having a fun contest to promote Motherhood and  to find out if your a Scary Mommy. A scary mom is not what you may think it is, a scary mommy is one who leaves her house without lipstick etc. But reading some of the comment links I see that we all interpret it in many different ways.
So if you think that I am a Scary Mommy please leave a comment here and at http://www.scarymommy.com/the-search-for-a-scary-mommy so that I can win the amazing prize that she is giving away:)
Many of you who have read a post on my blog Survival Mode will know that my whole experience with birthing my son was a joyus experience. If you haven't been to my blog to read it, I will give a bit of a recap. I was twenty years old when I became pregnant with my son, I was not planning on having any children but had done nothing to prevent it. The pregnancy was going as normal as I thought it could go, being a first time mom, I didn't know what to expect. I went to my gynecologist appointment a week before having my son and my doctor had told me that he wanted to start seeing me weekly because my stomach was measureing smaller and smaller, which I know wasn't normal. I went the next week and found out that the amniotic sac was losing fluid and that my son was in distress and already in the birth canal. I was transferred to the local hospital where I live to be monitored when my gynecologist came over to the hospital and told me that I was going to have to go to a different hospital in Provo where they would be better equipped to handle my small baby. This whole time I thought it was all a big mistake and that I would be going home soon. Life Flight was backed up so I got a ride via the ambulance:) It was aroung lunch time when I arrived at Utah Valley Regional Medical Center and I was starving!! I asked Jeremy one of the EMTs to grab a lunch tray, but he wouldn't *sad face* { I know that him and his partner were going to have a good lunch before returning home}. I got settled into a room on monitors for myself and the baby, when nurses started running in and out of my room franticly. The anestesiologist came in and wanted to do the epideral, I couldn't because I had no idea what was going on, so he then explained to me that my son's heart had stopped and that they need to do an emergency c-section, I then complied. I was taken into the operating room and the doctor started to poke my feet and toes to see if I could feel, which I could, but they could not wait any longer. I could feel the doctor cut me from one side to the other, and the pulling and tugging to get him out. Finally he was out, I didn't get to see him until midnight November 1st. He weighed 2lbs. 4.5oz. He was in the NICU for one month and one day before I got to bring him home, we were not even home for a week when he got pneumonia and needed to be hospitalized again, oh did I mention that he also had collic?
I being a mom I just don't think that I was cut out to do it more then one time. I always tease about me being on the front page of our towns local newspaper if I had more then one child: Mother Kills Kids; Kills Self. Don't get me wrong, I love my son with all my but just don't think that I could be a mom to more kids:)
There is this lady that I always see at the local market, me in my sweats and sneakers hair in a rubberband, no makeup on probably with racoon eyes {my son looks good though}, she is dressed to the nines Seriously {her children were dressed like me without the racoon eyes}, her kids are running a muck throwing things on the floor screaming and she doesn't raise her voice not one time. One day we walked out of the market at the same time and we were parked right next to each other and I about threw up in my mouth, when she opened up the door to her Cadillac Escalade, there was trash all over in her car, the seats were stained with ??? I know that we all have a Little trash in our cars because we have kids, but I think that she might have a dead animal in there or something. That's when I realized that even though she is dressed to the nines and has a nice car and this seemingly Perfect life that her life isn't as perfect as she or I or probably anybody else thought that it was. I raise my voice, I look like I just woke up and ran to the store, I don't cook dinner every night, I don't do laundry everyday, I Do my son, but I am not pretending to be something or someone that I am not, Because there isn't enough time in a day to try and be the  Perfect Mom even though we all try, we are who we are and that needs to be good enough for us just like it is good enough for our kids and for our families and our friends,who know us and who ♥  us no matter what!!!

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Everything to Three October 20, 2009 at 7:36 PM  

Perfect mom's boring.........I know. I tried being one. My boys love the mom who leaves the dishes in the sink (for days) so that we can build forts with the bed sheets and living room furniture! Kid's of perfect mom's don't know much about their mom's because they are too busy cleaning and polishing. Perfect is for Pansies....

Don't run from the storm. Dance in the rain!

golden girl October 21, 2009 at 9:25 PM  

beautiful post. thank you for sharing your story. i try to be perfect, but it's unrealistic. i'm beginning to accept my flaws and move on. take care.

Mama Kat October 21, 2009 at 9:30 PM  

I'd rather be scary and perfect...an escalade would sure be nice to drive around town in my sweats. ;)